Overview: The Struggle of Self and the Path to Self-Mastery
This transcript captures a deep, philosophical dialogue between a host and Dr. Cindy Trimm, focusing on the tension between who we are and who we are meant to become. Dr. Trimm shares her journey from poverty to becoming an international best-selling author and leadership expert, offering profound insights on self-mastery, identity, and leadership.
Key Themes & Insights
1. The Foundation: Turning Within vs. Turning Without
- Poverty as a Launchpad: Dr. Trimm explains that poverty forced her to look inward for resources, discovering an
iteration of yourself that poverty refuses to reflect. This aligns with the concept of Unlocking Your Potential: The Power of Transcendent Awareness and Self-Discovery, where turning inward is key to unlocking new levels of potential. - The Power of Choice: She emphasizes that every decision is an
appointment with your future. By recognizing you have options, even in scarcity, you reclaim your personal power. - Reframing Narratives: You are the co-writer of your life script. You have the right to insist on a
plot twistand refuse to play a supporting role in a script you didn't write.
2. Understanding Self-Mastery
- Definition: Self-mastery starts with self-awareness, which is
the ability to know where you end and everyone else begins. It's about taking dominion over what you are not. - Identity vs. Personality: Your identity (being a
megadayor created in God's image) is not determined by your chromosomes or past experiences. Your personality is a vessel, but your identity is your essence. - The Ship Analogy: A ship sails in water but sinks when it takes it on. The goal is to not take on others' perceptions, drama, or negative narratives. This practice of intentional focus is central to Mastering Focus and Personal Growth: A Comprehensive Guide.
3. The Art of Reframing and Handling Rejection
- Rejection as a Gift: Rejection is an announcement that you have
outgrown a relationship, realm, or region. It signals they lack the capacity for your next level of greatness. - Celebrating Rejection: Dr. Trimm celebrates rejection because it gives her the
good gift of goodbye, allowing her to move to environments that can hold her potential. This reframing is a powerful application of Unlocking Success: The Power of a Growth Mindset Explained. - Never Repeat an Untruth: You should never repeat a negative or false statement about yourself, as you are programming your brain to become it.
4. The Power of Vision and Execution
- Vision Tunes Your Station: Vision acts as a broadcasting station, helping you filter out the noise and focus on what you want.
- 20-Year Vision: Every individual should have a minimum 20-year life plan. This vision should be written and turned into spoken declarations.
- The Three Pillars of Execution:
- Self-Care: Care for the self you know. Center yourself in your identity, not your titles.
- Life as a Laboratory: See failures as successful discoveries of what doesn't work (the Edison principle).
- Team Capacity: A leader must not only have a vision but also assess if the team has the collective capacity to execute it.
Practical Takeaways
- Be the Only, Not the Best:
A lot of people try to be the best, but you have no competition if you are the only. Just show up and be the only.This philosophy is a powerful guide for anyone learning to prioritize their own path, as discussed in Navigating Happiness, Success, and Self-Prioritization in Modern Life. - The 80/20 Rule: Spend 80% of your energy on your internal self (
being) and only 20% on external action (doing). - Change Your Internal Dialogue: The stories you tell yourself determine your reality. Change the internal script to change the external outcome.
- Comfort is the Enemy:
Comfort is where your dreams go to die.You never want to get to a point where you are completely comfortable, as that signals the end of growth. This urgency to evolve is a core message of Stop Chasing Success: Become Your Future Self Now with Dr. Benjamin Hardy.
Recommended Reading by Dr. Cindy Trimm
If you are new to her work, Dr. Trimm recommends starting with:
- Unstoppable
- Prevail
- Hello Tomorrow
- The Trilogy: Commanding Your Morning, Goodbye Yesterday, and Hello Tomorrow
Final Thought: The Light
When everything around you seems dark, it is not a sign that the light has gone out. It is a sign that you are the light. Stop looking for it; be the spotlight.
There is often a struggle between the self that is known and the self that one believes one is called to be. How do you
navigate that? >> You are introduced [music] to an iteration of yourself that already
refused to reflect. With most people they turn without rather than turn within. [music] You never want to get to
a point where you're comfortable >> cuz when you're comfortable you stop growing.
>> So good. >> That's why vision is important. It's good
>> because it tunes your station. And one of the best practices of leadership [music] is not just the ability to
envision the future >> but to articulate it. Where are we going?
>> Do we have the capacity as a team? >> Most young leaders and specifically in this environment are facing. If you are
called for anything great and you're smart, you're going to resist the call. A lot of people try to be the best, but
you have no competition if you are the only. Just show up and be the only. >> If there is somebody who's watching this
conversation and they're encountering Dr. Cindy Trim for the first time and they want to study your work, where
would you recommend they start? >> Hello family. Welcome to another episode of Ideas That Matter. My guest today is
Dr. [music] Cindy Trim, international best-selling author. She's written books that have sold well over a million
copies worldwide. She's been a leader in politics [music] and in business. She spends her time traveling the world and
teaching people about leadership, about mastery of self, mastery of the world, and most importantly about how to make
sure you leave the world a better place than you found it. If you are a leader asking yourself questions about how can
you do better and improve, this is the conversation for you. I need you to do one thing though. Get a pen and paper
because you're going to be writing down some really, really powerful notes, great wisdoms, and a lot of quotable
quotes. Enjoy the episode. Hit like, share, subscribe. We'll see you on the other end of this. Cheers, Dr. Cindy.
>> Hey, [laughter] I know about this. >> Thank you for coming on the podcast.
>> Thank you. >> So, we end every podcast with a dad joke. This is mine.
After dinner, my wife asked if I could clear the table. I needed a running start, but I made it.
>> I don't get this one either. [laughter] >> After dinner, my wife asked if I could clear the table. I needed a running
start. >> Yes, I get it. >> Do you get it?
>> Yeah. Airplane. It's an airplane joke. >> Oh, clear your tables. >> Of course, the runway.
>> Yay. >> Needed two standard deviations of thought to get that one.
>> Yes. >> Let's hear yours. >> Here's mine. Why is Peter Pan always
flying? >> I don't know why. >> Cuz he never lands.
>> I never [laughter] never never >> So good.
>> This one is good. Yeah, >> that's good. That's good. >> Yeah.
>> So, what is it about? What in your upbringing
framed the ideas you would hold to be true which would make you who you are?
>> Poverty. >> Explain this to me. >> I think um poverty is like a launchpad.
It puts enough pressure on you >> to go within to look for the resources that you don't have without.
And so what happened with me in growing up um and I started my first business at eight because there was a lack of
resources >> right? >> So with most people they turn without
rather than turn within. So if you turn without you end up being a beggar >> right
>> and you undermine your potential >> right? But if you turn within, you are introduced to an iteration of yourself
that poverty refuse to reflect. >> You are introduced to an iteration of the self that poverty refuses to
reflect. >> Yes. So
>> said differently, that iteration of yourself can't exist and you were poor at the same time.
>> Exactly. >> Huh. >> So that's when I discovered I was a
businesswoman. >> Huh. At 8, I discovered that I was a creator of my future,
>> right? >> And that every decision that I made was like making an appointment with my
future. And so if I landed in my future, then I didn't have to be surprised by the realities therein cuz I created it.
>> Every decision that I made was an appointment with my future. >> Yes.
>> Say that in English. In English, I'm simply saying that, you know, you've g you're given freedom of choice.
>> And a choice can only be made if you have options. >> Mhm.
>> And so poverty um usually conditions a person >> to believe that they don't have options.
>> So good. So in the absence of you or me since you're asking me the question making a decision or choosing in the
absence of that a choice is made for me. >> So good. >> Yeah. So I lose you know I lose my
efficacy. I lose my personal power. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Um by looking outside
>> for what is inside. >> But it's in it's in potential form. It's like a seed. Oh, how did you cognize
this at 8? >> Um, I just did. It was obvious. It was just obvious to me. I mean, there was no
money in the house. Um, we had more month than money. [laughter] So, my mother, I mean, stretched
everything, but there was more month than money. >> God bless her.
>> And but the beautiful thing about my mother is she was calibrated, >> right?
>> Uh, by her upbringing, >> right? And she grew up in wealth, >> right?
>> So she had a wealth paradigm, >> right? >> And that's what she transmitted to me.
And how she transmitted it was if I said, "I want to do ballet." She never said, "I don't have money." She would
say, "Okay, I want to I need a new pair of shoes." Okay. And that okay
was the catalyst that gave rise for me owning my life >> and taking 100% responsibility
>> for my progress for my education from for my financial health >> that okay and so I didn't grow up with a
whole lot of nos >> and if there was not a whole not a lot lot of nos it meant yes to me and the
yes was an affirmation Cindy You could do this yourself. If this is what you want, you can create it yourself.
>> So because there was no nose, it mean as I'm I want to translate this and download it for myself. So you're saying
because there was no nose, it meant that the barrier was never there was never a wall there, but rather
a pathway. It was yes, therefore find the way. >> Find the way. It was it was affirming,
>> right? So for something Yeah. >> Yeah. And and now that we know you can find the way to make it so.
>> And that was my interpretation. >> So good. >> Because a lot of times we craft
narratives. >> Doc, this is so good >> around an experience.
>> So good. >> And um if you understand that you are co-writing
>> um your script >> and anytime you get good and ready, you can insist on a plot twist. and that you
are never or I I discovered looking back as I analyze my life. I discovered that I did not have to play supporting
actress in the unfolding of a script that neither me nor God wrote. >> So you you can't just hand me a script
and expect me to play the role. And I discovered that I was born to play lead actress
>> in the unfolding of my own life. So I played lead >> and I never asked permission.
>> I never knew I couldn't do it. I just did it. >> If I may, there are so many ideas there
that that I just want to pick at. But give me the grace to just sequence them. So
you don't accept the script. >> No. >> Which means you would have had to
understand that somebody wrote it. Yes. >> Right. >> And and that they probably wouldn't have
written it for it to favor you as the lead actress. >> Correct.
>> In other words, that that whomever it is, whether it's a person or a system that crafted that script would have had
an agenda in the script crafting. >> Absolutely. >> Whoa.
Whoa. Okay. >> So, I you know, I just took the pan out of their hand and never never gave them
permission. never ever gave them permission. >> Of course, what will happen when you do
that is that those who have written the script will insist you play the character that they
have developed for your likeness. >> So, they lived a disappointed life. [laughter]
I disappointed them. >> I fired them. >> I love you.
>> You are not producer. You are not the producer. [laughter] You're not the producer of my life. Oh,
>> this is so good. >> So, you just fired. >> I just love how you made it. They lived
a disappointed life. >> Yeah. >> Rather than I lived a frustrated life
constantly pushing against the boundaries, it was you're disappointed. I'm not frustrated.
>> So, the whole concept that I'm introducing is the concept that falls under the major major heading
selfmastery. M >> selfmastery [clears throat] starts with self-awareness.
>> Mhm. Mhm. >> So a lot of us try to have dominion outside of ourselves.
>> But the first I think law of dominion is to have mastery over what you are not to have dominion over what you are not. So
you have to determine who you are. And that takes work. Who am I? How do I define myself? And self-awareness
is the ability to know where you end >> and everyone else begins. >> You know, and I'll give you imagery
here. >> Um, a ship is built to sail in water. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> But not take it on. And it only sinks when it takes on water. >> That's right.
>> So, I learn not to take it on. I don't take on drama. I don't take on people's perception of me, good or bad. There's a
lot of things I don't take on. I didn't take on a designation of poverty. I just didn't take it on.
So my life is just floating in the sea of success and prosperity. >> Can we go back to this idea of
selfmastery? >> Yeah. >> You said it starts with taking dominion
over what you are not. >> Yes. >> What does that mean?
>> It simply means that you know you live in society, you live in a family. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> And people constantly tell you what you are and what you're not. Yes, ma'am. >> Educational system does it and it
creates a paradigm. >> I get that. >> That um ends up being self-imposed
limitations and lids, >> right? >> So, you have to have the courage to
really cast all of those things from off of you to discover who you really are. And I'll give you another example which
is easy for people to understand. Coping skills, >> which is unconscious
programming on how to make life work. Mhm. >> So, how to navigate the terrain of other
people, >> you know, how to navigate the terrain in the workplace and then you end up with
these coping skills >> and people end up in therapy for years. >> That's right.
>> Because they're trying to fix or eliminate something that they're not rather than finding out who they are.
It's a waste of time. These are just coping skills. So, if you learn them, you can unlearn them. And um you know
talking about um selfmastery a part of selfmastery of course is mindset mastery.
>> Yes ma'am. >> And so as a man thinkketh in his heart so is he. So if you could change your
thought you could change your life. >> And so you know a lot of times we absorb and we rehearse
>> what other people think about us >> and it's almost self-hypnosis. You keep saying it long enough until you
build these neurological pathways and your life always travels that way. So when people sit in front of me and they
start talking about this is what people said, this is what's happening on social media, I stop them and I say never ever
repeat an untruth about yourself. Never. Because you're programming yourself to become it.
>> Yo, >> so you don't you don't repeat gossip. You don't you just let people feel what
they want to feel. Why? Because they have the right to live out of their mind, but they don't have the right to
live out of yours. >> That's your That's your right. >> And I can only live out of my mind.
>> Hey, >> so I'm not going to spend my precious 24 hours.
>> So good. >> Figuring out what you think about me. >> So good.
>> I'd rather tell you >> than to allow you to figure me out. Show up. Show up as myself. And there's only
one space in this world in humanity that I can occupy. And that is a space called me.
>> And I owe the world >> um I owe the world an explanation of who I am.
>> I do. >> Told by your own words. >> Yeah. Yeah. Um Superman, I love movies,
right? >> He's talking to his father trying to figure out who he is,
>> right? And so his father says, "Somewhere out there, you have another father.
>> And he sent you here to the earth for a reason." >> Mhm.
>> You owe it to yourself and the world to find out what that reason is. >> Mhm.
>> You have to find it out. >> And so going back to the whole idea of growing
up in poverty, I had to find out, discover who is this human being? Because your identity determines how you
show up in the world. >> Mhm. >> It determines everything.
>> Amen. >> You know, you've got to live >> from your identity.
>> I know that's true. >> Do you know what excites me? Not just tech, not just business. What actually
really really drives me, the one thing that actually really excites me is when Africa stops watching the future, when
we stop being observers of what's happening and we start hosting it. Right? And I think for the longest time
we've spoken about innovation as though it lives somewhere else. It's always been this thing that's coming from
Silicon Valley or Europe or the Middle East, right? But in 2026, something important is happening here in our
continent here at home. For the first time ever, Africa is hosting the UDO Experience right here in our own
continent. And we're doing it in Nairobi. Right. On the 3rd and 4th of September, we're going to be gathered in
Nairobi, Kenya, 2026. This is the time for the Auto Africa experience. And trust me when I say this, this isn't
just another one of those like meetings or conferences. Although meeting and conferencing is important, but it is a
global opportunity for business owners across the African continent. You know, I I remember we hosted a global event in
what 2010. Yeah. The FIFA World Cup. And now Kenya is hosting this ODO experience and I think it really is about how do we
take the continent and allow each other to take the next step forward. Before we go any further, you know, I've been
talking about ODO for quite some time now. You would have seen that they're clearly one of our partners in the
channel and they have a full business management suite. It's uh sales, it's CRM, it's website inventory, HR,
accounting, everything you need to turn your idea into a business and to run that business solidly on one platform.
And every year, businesses, developers, entrepreneurs, students, industry leaders from around the world gather at
the Auto Experience to explore the future of business and the future of technology. Usually they do these in
like Brussels right in Belgium because that's of course where Odo is headquartered but this year Africa gets
the state and that matters to me. It matters because it means businesses from across the continent get to see how
modern companies are building and scaling live in person. So what are you going to see at the
conference? You're going to see some live product demos. You're going to see some new AI features that they're
launching, which features I think are going to be built specifically for African businesses. You're going to see
some real companies sharing practical use cases. There's going to be some incredible training sessions and
workshops that they're going to be hosting. And of course, networking cuz you want to meet developers and and
founders and decision makers and financeers, even entertainment, games, live performances. It's all going to be
happening at the conference. I've always insisted on the importance of being in the right rooms
and it's important because that's how you build scale is through networks. So you don't want to miss this. Whether
you're an entrepreneur, a developer or an executive or a student, this is the platform for you. You want to be in this
room. You want to meet others. You want to engage and you want to build. So whether you're a builder in the early
stages or a scaler looking to scale up your business or an executive, you want to be at this conference. See you there.
Link in the description. Get your tickets. Cheers. >> Um I was talking to Les Brown and he
asked me a question. He said, "You're an alien. I know you're an alien. [laughter]
Tell me you came from I planet." Right. And he said, >> you said it with that gregarious voice,
right? He said, "Who who are you? Who are you?" And I thought first and initially I
wanted to talk about what I did. >> Mhm. >> And then I was cautioned
by this inner wisdom. >> Mhm. >> And I heard in in my ear
and I repeated it to him. I said I am I me day the highest representative of divine genius and intelligence given as
a gift to humanity for such a time as this. >> But not only am I a mega day you are and
all humanity is >> and if we can just own that identity automatically the world will be a better
place. Why? A better me is a better we. >> A better I is a better us. M >> so rather than demanding everyone else
change >> why I why don't I take the lead and that's what selfmastery is all about
you know getting back in the driver's seat discovering who you are knowing where you end someone else begins
>> and then the book the there are book ends there are 14 other dimensions and then the last one is selflove after
after selfawareness knowing where you end and someone else begins Mhm. >> The next thing is self-nowledge
>> and knowing who you are, your personality and feeling comfortable with [clears throat] it because that goes
into self approval. >> So once you see who you are and by the way identity doesn't corroborate
or collaborate with the 23 chromosomes that was given to you by your father and the 23 chromosomes that was given to you
by your mother. Those chromosomes, they build your personality, but they don't build your identity.
>> Explain this. >> Identity is
you being a mega day. Period. Mic drop. That's it. You're created in the image and after the likeness of God.
>> So, the more you know about God, the more you know about yourself. >> I really need to download that. The well
the first thing I learn about God in Genesis 1, God created the heavens and the earth.
>> That's right. >> So that makes me a creator. I create the realities in my life.
>> Right. >> Period. >> As did God create the reality we were
living in. >> Huh. And if you can own that, I mean, you know, 8 years old, I couldn't
articulate it like this because I didn't have the intellectual building blocks, right?
>> But I can articulate it now. >> I can articulate it. >> So So there'd be somebody watching this
who feels I love the word you used that you said uh Liz Brown used with you who
feels alien in their environment. Mhm. >> And typically what happens is if I feel alien in an environment,
I initially assume something's wrong with the environment. >> But given sufficient feedback from the
environment that something's wrong with me, I then go >> then something must be wrong with me
>> and then I I begin to go through this process of trying to correct whatever it is with me that is wrong. This is what
you were talking about the coping mechanisms and the therapy, etc. Mhm. >> So I I love this idea that it's it's
about knowing where you end and the rest of the world, the rest of society begins. Love that.
>> Um it does mean though still that there will constantly be a tension between self and the rest. How how have you
negotiated that tension? And let me ask the question this way. One of the things I found most was fascinating about your
your story, your history, and your resume is you were constantly in rooms where it would outwardly appear as if
somebody would have disqualified you from being in that room. >> Yeah.
>> But but it reads almost as like a tenacious story of just well, she just kind of bulldozed her way in and went in
there. >> No, I showed up and owned my space. And
a lot of people try to be the best, but you have no competition if you are the only. So stop trying to be the best.
Stop trying to qualify and fight and compete. Just show up and be the only. I'm the
only person in the world that can be Cindy Trim. There could be sound alikes, look alikes, [laughter]
right? That's good. >> But I am the only one. So I own this
space. >> Yeah, that's good. >> And you know, every year on my birthday
>> Mhm. [clears throat] >> I'm introduced to a new iteration, a new version of me.
>> So I have to get I have to have the courage >> to let go of the old version.
>> No matter how successful she was, >> I still have to let her go. [clears throat]
>> And I get one year to discover this next iteration. Mhm. >> And that's why birthdays
people are confused cuz we're not celebrating who you were at birth. We're celebrating who you're becoming on
your next birthday. >> This is why we're marking the milestone. >> Yeah.
>> Right. >> So, you have the opportunity to let the past go, no matter how good, no matter
how bad. >> So good. >> And then you've got this clean slate.
>> So good. You know, there was a time when I wasn't 21. I was 20. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> So, why would I want to hold on to the 20-year-old version >> version of yourself?
>> When the 21-year-old version has never been rejected, has never been hurt, [clears throat] has never been
traumatized, has never been failed. >> And I say if you want to get to know someone awesome and incredible, get to
know yourself. >> Yeah. They would have been, we'll come back to these tenants of selfmastery
because I love this >> but they would have been in your journey disappointments for sure.
>> Rejections, disappointments, you name it. >> But I reserve the right to reframe all
of my experiences. >> Explain that >> and change the narrative.
>> Okay, this is what I struggle with. So explain this. >> So I say to people, I say to people,
[snorts] >> poverty was a gift. rejection was a gift.
And they say, "What do you mean?" So rejection is an announcement that you've outgrown a relationship or realm or
region. That they no longer have the capacity >> for what you are carrying. They may have
>> they may have capacity for your gifts but not your greatness. >> They may have capacity for your now but
not your next. And if you don't have the courage to give yourself the good gift of goodbye, then rejection becomes that
gift. >> So there's nothing wrong with you. There's nothing wrong with them. They
just don't have the capacity. That realm, that region just don't have the capacity. And it doesn't we don't have
to assign something being wrong with anybody. >> Sure.
>> Mind your own business. My business is right here. Could things be the way they are because
you are the way you are? What one thing can you change that can change everything?
You could change your mind about yourself and how you show up in this world.
And so I and I alone have the right to reframe any experience any. So I always choose positive. Do you have
a a sequence or a ritual that you follow when you're reframing an experience? >> I just tell it.
>> So your method your methodology is you you speak it into your mind. >> Yeah. So when a person says, "Oh, what
did you would do with rejection? I celebrated it." Why? Because it was an announcement that I had outgrown a RAM
region or relationship and stayed too long. I got overfamiliar with the familiar dog. I got over comfortable. So
comfort is where your dreams go to die. Familiarity is where you shoot your potential at point blank range. So you
always want tension in your life. You never want to get to a point where you're comfortable. Yes, ma'am.
>> Cuz when you're comfortable, you stop growing. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> So life demands growth. >> Anything that doesn't grow dies. >> That's right.
>> And so that's the same thing. It's the same thing with the seed of potential. >> Mhm.
>> Something in you dies. That's why people are depressed. >> They're not depressed because of things
that are outside of them. >> Depression happens when something inside of you dies and you allow it. You you
you didn't pay attention to that. You were too caught up in an external experience. You were too caught up in
excusing yourself from taking 100% responsibility for your life. Mhm. >> And you became a spectator and you
excuse yourself. And this is how people excuse themselves. >> I'm a victim.
>> Stuff is happening to me, not because of me, not through me. I don't take any responsibility. I could have spent my
life talking about my father and his abandonment >> and his betrayal of the entire family
>> and people would have been sad, you know, I can understand why you're like you are. But I reframed the story.
Everything I needed, my father gave it to me at conception. I didn't need it at birth. I needed at
conception. [laughter] >> And that was a 23 chromosomes
that eventually built this. I call it a hub, a wealth hub. >> Mhm.
>> I'm already a trillionaire. >> Thanks go thanks to my my father who contributed to that wealth. Mhm.
>> I'm the proud owner of 72 trillion >> cells. >> And every day I get to determine how I'm
going to use them. >> That's good. >> And I can convert it.
>> That's good. >> I can convert it into wealth, a book, a business. I choose how I use that uh
energy because you know the cells are containers of energy. I get to choose how I do it.
>> Every every cell has a power source. >> Mhm. >> What's yours?
Well, I think a better question is what my what's my superpower? >> Yes. Sure. Sure.
>> Okay. >> Sure. >> I think my superpower
is acceptance. Accepting people as I find them, not trying to change anybody,
but also having the courage to change myself. That's my superpower.
>> Hello family. So, I just learned something recently that I thought was absolutely crazy. That in the last month
alone, 49.1% of you and our community that have watched these videos aren't subscribed
to the channel. Listen, it really, really would help me. It would go a long way if you did. We learn together, laugh
together, we share value with each other. And so, if I can ask anything of you, it would be please hit that
subscribe button below. It helps us improve the algorithm for the channel. It helps make sure that YouTube
recommends it to you. But more importantly, it helps me get better guests so I can present them to you. I
look forward to seeing you on the other side of this. Cheers. >> Going back to selfmastery. Selfmastery.
That's my superpower. Mastering myself. >> Daunting.
>> It's It's the >> mirror is a hard thing to look into. >> Yeah. Yeah. But it's fun.
It's fun. You have to have courage to journey within. So the last of man's exploration is not out of space, is not
shooting for Mars. >> Oh man, >> the last of man's exploration
is the journey that he will take within. >> That's so good. >> And it's a it's a wonderful journey.
It's scary. And this is why um coaches are important. Mentors, I think a mentor, a person has to identify a
mentor >> and say you're my mentor. M >> and a mentor's job is to take you to a
place in yourself >> that you don't have courage to go by yourself.
>> And that's self-discovery. They put up a mirror >> so that you could admire who you are and
stop admiring who they are. >> A mentor doesn't want to be admired. >> They just want to be a mirror. This is
who you are and here are the tools to become a better you. You don't want to be a better me. You want to be a better
you. >> Amen. >> And that's the only space you can
occupy. And that space is called identity. And your identity is not a shanty,
is not a condominium, is not even a mansion. It is an estate. >> So good. It's good. Yes.
>> So if it is true that we command our reality um
what does that mean practically? >> Practically >> it means that you take 100%
responsibility >> right >> for your actions and the outcomes
>> right >> and if you end up with outcomes that you don't like
you could change the strategy. I get that part. >> Is it can it What is the risk of just
running into it being an illusion? >> Life is a risk, isn't it? >> This is true.
>> And that's what faith is all about. It's climbing a tree, going out on a limb.
>> Mhm. >> And not waiting for that limb to break. >> Mhm.
>> It's sowing the limb limb off and daring to grow wings [laughter] on the decline >> on the way down. on the way down. Wings
don't fail me now. [laughter] I know you're there. I know you're there somewhere.
>> Open up. >> So that's, you know, to me, that's what challenge is all about. Someone has to
challenge you. >> Something has to challenge you. >> That's good. And if you don't have the
courage uh to I don't know take risks if you don't have the courage then life and
people will challenge you. >> So I I um you don't have to answer this but I ask it because even after our
conversation yesterday this was a a ruminating thought at the back of my mind. So have you never had a
moment of self-doubt? Just a moment where you thought I shouldn't be in here. I'm not qualified. Never. ever.
>> I've never had >> in your entire life. >> You know, I I tell people
because I grew up in poverty, some of my wiring is missing. [laughter] >> I love that.
>> It's just missing. [laughter] It's just missing. >> Line is I was dropped at birth and so
it's it's disconnected. But I love that. >> Yeah. Yeah. [laughter] I I I I never got the the memo.
>> That's so good. I didn't I didn't get the memo to be afraid. I didn't you know I tell you this story when I was in
maybe second grade. >> We had we had to write an essay. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> And it was the meanest teacher ever >> that I loved. I loved her. >> She was mean. The the principal was
afraid of her. The teachers were afraid of her. The students were afraid of her. And I was the only one that wasn't
afraid. I talked so much. She used to put tape on my mouth, [laughter] put me in a corner. And I would go home and
say, "Guess what? >> My teacher is so lonely. [laughter] She wanted me to stay. She, you know,
she didn't let me go out to to recess because she needed company. She needed [laughter] company." Right. I I would
tell these stories to my mother. >> That's good. >> And um so this particular teacher used
to say, "You talk too much. M that's what you do. You talk too much and put tape around my mouth
>> and I didn't feel like it was an insult. I didn't feel like I said, "Well, let me find a different way to communicate."
>> Mhm. >> So, I started writing. >> It's still a form of communication.
>> And um she stood me up one day and she said, "This is the best essay." >> Wow.
>> That I have ever read. >> Wow. >> In this age group.
>> Wow. And years later, I became a best-selling author. >> Wow.
>> So, being able to reframe our lives and to think differently, I think I was born this way.
>> Mhm. >> Um- because of um the gift that I carry to the world
>> and it's a gift of you can do it. >> Mhm. >> You can do it.
>> Yesterday when you were on stage and I I said this to uh your aid, I was chatting to her cuz she was sat next to me. I
said it to you afterwards was um as a professional orator which you are there is a theater sometimes in our
business right that requires that you >> you you take uh residence on stage >> over the years I've learned that the
less the work the person does to take residence typically the more power this person has in other words the true power
doesn't require theater >> it just is. So I'm sat watching you and you were sitting
>> and you were speaking. You were looking at your notes and you were speaking but the whole room was dead quiet. Right
>> to the untrained eye it it it is a moment. But as I was looking at it I thought
there must be a there must be a self assuring belief that made you think you had you can do that
>> because you've got to be audacious to do that. That's the jump out and hope that it opens up because it can work.
>> Mhm. >> Or it cannot, right? You could be up there and the whole room could could
break up and people could be doing their own things and just not listening to you.
>> So So I wonder, help me here. Help me. >> One, did you rehearse this? >> No.
>> This is the question I wanted to ask. But the second question which is the more important question is how did you
know that you would still command the room >> even if you didn't posture to what the
room expected you to do. >> Mhm. Um >> this by the way as you think about the
answer this is actually the question most young leaders and specifically in this environment are facing.
>> There is a template a playbook of how you're supposed to show up. >> Mhm. And this template has been well
rehearsed, well written, and several people have made this template a truism. And
>> so anybody who shows up and says, "This just doesn't feel authentic." >> Mhm.
>> Right. Requires a ton of courage. >> So I was sat there going, "Could I could I sit and speak?" And I No, I wouldn't
do that. Back of I was like, "I wouldn't do that. I I certainly, you know, I wouldn't have the courage. It would take
me a while to to have the courage to do that, but you you did it. And follow me here. And as you were doing it, as you
were doing it, I sent a note to one of my guys and I went, you weren't just doing it. You were also teaching and
being instructional and you were giving each teaching point enough time to be digested.
>> Mhm. >> Which to me then tells me this. It's not just that you're doing it in a way other
people wouldn't do. It's also that you're doing it at your time. Do you get like this is huge. This is, you know, if
you if you go to a rock concert, there is a a speed and a cadence at which a rock concert has to take place. A comedy
show, a public speaking keynote, there is a an energy. There's you were just like, "No, no, no. My methodology, my
message, my timing." >> Mhm. >> And that's what I mean by commanded the
room. It's almost if you went and said, "Whatever the culture is here of how you guys do this,
>> I'm going to do it the way that I do it." Mhm. >> Okay. This is this is the foreground. So
now I get back to the question. >> Where the hell does that come from? [laughter] Cuz you've got to have some
serious guts to go. >> It comes from integrity. >> And then mo what motivation,
>> right? >> And intention. So what is the intention of that speech?
>> Right. >> What did it I intend to happen? >> Yes ma'am. I intended them I intended
that that messaging was in one that brought admiration to me.
>> Going back to the mirror, >> my articulation >> hopefully would be the conversation
>> or question that someone would ask and I was only giving them the answer. >> This is so good. So, and
>> so good >> becoming the voice that usually runs in their head.
>> Yes, ma'am. >> So, I just become that echo chamber. >> So, good.
>> I'm just um reverberating. >> So, good. >> Um the uh answers or even the questions
and coming up with the answers. So if I if I downloaded that for myself, what you're saying is you thought about you
were intentional about making sure your contribution was a guide through the woods
>> rather than a performance on a stage. >> Yes. So if this was the only message I delivered to this group of people,
>> would they have enough? >> This is so good. >> To go on with their lives.
>> This is good. Um, and it was not about even when I tell my stories. >> It's not for um me to expose my my life
or my history. >> Um, it it's just me saying I'm not better than you. I am you.
>> I this is just an assignment. >> But when I walk off this stage, I have to go on living with living my life.
>> I had to I have to go on creating success and prosperity. That's what I have to do. But I also recognize that
you have to do it too. >> And here's some of the tools that I would would use if I was you.
>> I understand that. >> And I have the receipts. So I'm giving you something that has worked for me.
>> This receipts question. It's interesting you say that because that was literally going to be my next question about as
you were speaking the principles you were teaching. Um I found myself asking the question which
was which came first? Did the belief precede the achievement or the did the achievement precede the belief?
>> Belief >> preceded the achievement. >> Yes.
>> Right. And if this is true then what was the belief based on? Typically beliefs are aggregations of knowledge which is
based on data. We we start with experiences. We accumulate data. We aggregate this into knowledge base and
seen frequently enough we form a belief. >> And so you kind of just transcended all of this. when to believe, created the
outcome, and then worked backwards. Yeah. >> The reason this is important is because
a lot of the people who watch this podcast are at the stage where they're having this constant tension between
belief and outcome. They believe their lives could be more, should be more, can be more,
>> but they don't execute at the level of their belief. >> Okay. So, help me with this. This this
is the book, >> right? It's the execution. So I think if you see yourself, how you see yourself,
>> let me say it a different way. Um you cannot outperform your current concept of self nor rise above the level of your
selfworth. >> So rather than doing [clears throat] all the work out here frantically, do all
the work here >> and that's 80% of it >> and your execution is only 20%. It's
good. >> So, it takes all of the laborious exercise of futility,
>> the theater, >> and you throw that out. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> And then you spend more time >> Mhm. >> being than doing.
>> So, good. >> We spend more time doing because we know somewhere innately
>> Mhm. >> that we should be being, >> but we don't have the tools to be. Mhm.
>> We have the tools for per performance. >> Mhm. And these are the tools you were speaking about these selfmastery tools.
>> Yes. >> So you spoke about self-nowledge. >> Yeah.
>> I love that. >> Self-acceptance >> and then self-acceptance. Yeah.
>> What comes after the self-acceptance part? >> Self-discipline,
>> right? >> Yeah. So self-discipline and you know in in between there there's
something called self-promotion. M >> but before I get to the self-promotion, the self-disipline part
>> um and people could be more disciplined if they knew where they were going and they knew what they wanted.
>> Yes, ma'am. >> They could create the habits. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> And habits are how we structure our lives. Right. To >> take us from where we are to where we
have the potential to be. >> And you know, as adults, so good. >> As adults, Yes, ma'am.
>> we don't have a vision for our lives. M >> so any road will take you anywhere but you don't want to be anywhere you want
to be somewhere >> and >> at a specific time.
>> Yes ma'am. >> So you have to write a vision for your life.
>> I wrote this book Hello Tomorrow >> chapter number eight. >> By the way, love the title.
>> Yeah. Hello Tomorrow. I did Goodbye Yesterday too. >> Oh, I didn't know about this one.
>> But um in Hello Tomorrow chapter number eight, it shows you how to structure your life
>> right >> around 12 elements. Yes, ma'am. >> And these are micro visions.
>> And [clears throat] the big schema thing is your 20-year life plan. >> And you set in motion habits and
disciplines that will get you there. >> So you don't worry about what you don't want. You just focus on what you want.
And what you don't want will eliminate itself. >> So good. And so your thought interacts
with the quantum realm of unlimited possibilities and potentialities. Right? >> I get that.
>> And so the moment you make a decision Yes, ma'am. >> All other possibilities collapses.
>> And that decision travels out >> into this realm. That's right. >> Like a train.
>> That's exactly right. >> And it comes back to you as an experience or an encounter.
>> So good. >> An experience or an encounter. Somebody won't download that, but somebody's
going to get it. I I know exactly what you mean. >> Yeah. So, you know, again, that's what
is. Thoughts um and your vision and your attention and your focus creates this frequency.
>> So, the best way I can say this is you become a broadcasting station. >> That's it. Yeah. [laughter]
>> And you're going to you're going to pick up whatever you're tuned whatever you're tuned to.
>> So, good. And that's what why vision is important. >> It's good
>> because it tunes your station >> to [clears throat] what you want and not what you don't want.
>> So this is how you can defy odds >> because it clarifies it. >> So in other words, it removes the
clutter. >> Yeah. >> And you're able Oh, I just got it.
You're able to >> to detect the signal from the noise >> because you know exactly what what image
you're trying to transmit. And this is where ideas come from, right? >> So good.
>> So right now over our heads, >> right? >> Everything is streaming. Music is
streaming. Netflix is streaming. Everything is streaming. >> Sure.
>> Right. >> But what do I tune my mind to? It's determined by that vision. So when all
this stuff is happening around you >> and you have to make a decision with all the options that you've got
>> it is you being able to tune yourself >> to this one vision and that determines the choice that you make based on all
these options. >> I get it. >> Yeah. And so that's how I I live my
life. When does it translate from thought
>> to words? One of the things you you you ministered to me about yesterday, and thank you for that, by the way, is
you've got to be careful. We we say this in scripture, right? The the power of life and death is in the
tongue. >> Mhm. >> But we often say it as a throwaway
statement. >> Um what I understood you to say yesterday is you have to command it to
be >> command it. And and then what I also heard you to say is also don't command
that which people are trying to prophesy over your life >> unless it's aligned with the vision you
have of your life. >> Yeah. I'll give you an example of that. I was a little younger. I wasn't married
at that time. I got married later in life. And um one of the pastors walked up to
me crying and saying, you know, I feel like, you know, you need to give your life to the service of humanity cuz this
is God's will for your life and accept the fact that you might be single for the rest of your life.
>> And I said to him, I do not accept that as a word for my life. I do not. Why? Cuz I've already written my vision.
>> Right? So I didn't go out dating and running around and dressing in a certain way because I wrote my vision
>> and then I turned the vision into declarations >> and then my husband came.
>> Huh. Belief then the other >> because I was the one that said that I'm going to be um successful professionally
before I got married. I'm going to create this amazing life. for myself,
>> then I'll get married. So guess what happened? I created an amazing life for myself.
>> And then you got married. >> Then I got married. He came looking for me. I didn't go
looking for him. >> So good. >> And I didn't write bozo down [laughter]
on my vision. So I never attracted bozo. >> The clown wasn't there. >> No way.
>> That's good. >> Yeah. >> If I can.
>> Mhm. a practical takeaway, maybe a mechanics question. When you were writing this vision down,
>> is there a process that you follow? Is there a sequencing that you follow? >> Yeah. Yeah.
>> My first vision I wrote, this is my second 20-y year vision cuz every individual should have a 20 year life
vision. >> Sure. >> Or 10 20 year life plan. Every
corporation should have every um corporation should have a minimum of 50-year plan
>> and every nation should have a minimum of a 100red years. >> So individual 20 years.
>> Yeah. >> Corporation 50 years. >> Yes.
>> Nation 100 years. >> A minimum. >> Wow.
>> But it's a discipline of mind, isn't it? It's discipline. You have to discipline your mind.
You have to trust. We call it the inner wisdom. I call it the spirit of God. >> But if you call it the inner wisdom, I'm
fine with it. >> If you call it the spirit of God, he his his job is to download into your spirit.
>> Mhm. >> What is later uploaded in your mind and we call it an idea.
>> I like that. >> Jeremiah said, "I know the thoughts I think towards you." Talking about God.
thoughts of good, not of evil, to bring you to an expected end. >> Yes.
>> So, um, if he has it in his mind, then it's just a matter of time before I have it in my mind. And we call it a
desire. Not all of us desire the same thing. >> Right?
>> Pay attention to that. That's God speaking to you. It's a God whisper. >> And when he whispers in your ear, it's
only loud enough for you to hear. Nobody can confirm it. You can confirm it.
So I don't if God confirms this is your future, why would I want to run around looking for confirmation? That's right.
>> From someone else. >> Yeah. It was a It was a single call. It wasn't a conference call.
>> Come on. [laughter] >> Yes, it was. >> He dialed you.
>> Yes. He doubted me. >> Yeah. >> And so, you know, and then that's where
your beliefs come in. And then that's where your faith, having faith in God is one thing. Yes, ma'am.
>> But having faith in who God made you to be, made you, created you to accomplish. >> That is where all of the miracles
happen. >> You don't have to answer this, >> but let me be personal for a moment.
>> Mhm. >> There is often a struggle between >> the self that is known and the self that
one believes one is called to be. There's like a massive gap. It's a gaping
galaxy between these um [laughter]
how do you navigate that? This is in my experience this is often the wilderness, right? This is the
because let me let me let me refresh. have the idea, downloaded it spiritually, see it, vision there, but
only I see it. >> Nobody else sees it. >> Right.
>> Right. From here to there is tons of of hours, days, experiences with other people,
>> which probably will not confirm or affirm the place to which I'm headed. >> Mhm.
>> In fact, it'll often be tension, a contestation. It'll be a pull back to where I'm from rather than a pull to
where I'm going. Right. >> You work with leaders who I imagine >> often have this problem.
>> This is the challenge of leadership is it has to imagine that which is not yet >> and then fashion that which it leads to
believe that which is not yet >> and then take them there. >> Mhm.
>> But they won't be kicking and screaming. You read it in scripture, right? It's not as if each time God called his
people, they volunteered themselves. >> It was the It was the inverse. You told a story yesterday of uh um and I love
the way you you you told the story and you know this, you know, there he is in Nineveh and he's like, "Well, you got to
go this way." No, no, no. I don't want to go that way. No, you got to go this way. No, I don't want to go that way.
So, this is the this is the human experience. The human experience is >> if you are called for anything great and
you're smart, you're going to resist the call >> because you know the pain. It's you know
the cost. It's >> especially if you're called to leadership.
>> Well, this is it. >> Yeah. Because you you become a target. >> This is exact right.
>> Uh and you're targeted by people that don't have the courage to become what they have the potential to be.
>> Right. So they project that onto you. >> Yes. >> Why do you have the courage? And why are
you stepping out? Do you see the rest of us? >> Yes.
>> Hanging out over here following when we should be leading. Why are you leading? >> So good.
>> It's the big question. And I think you know it's a dilemma when we talk about best
practices. This takes us back to corporate language. And one of the best practices of
leadership is not just the ability to envision the future. >> Mhm.
>> But to articulate it, >> so you know, being able to articulate where we're going, where are we going?
>> When I was dating my husband, I asked him a question. And I said look I've lived as a single woman all my life
>> so I had to figure out where I am going >> but what I will not be comfortable with if we are engaging in this relationship
and you don't have a vision for us >> I have a vision for me >> I get this
>> I know you have a vision for you but what is the vision for us >> and if you do have it please articulate
it. so that we can come into agreement and I know how to run my play and you run your
play and the conversation goes like this. What do you expect of me as a wife?
>> But what do you expect of me as a woman? That's two different conversations. >> Now, here's what I expect from you as a
husband, >> and this is what I expect from you >> as a man.
>> Two different conversations. And so there are times that you will have to just be the man and not my
husband. And can I embrace that? So going back. >> So good.
>> Going back, you have to have that conversation. >> So good, Doc.
>> You know, you're a business owner, an author, a speaker. So when you show up >> um and you're talking with your spouse,
who am I listening to? Am I listening to you as the man >> that's pursuing his dreams and his goals
and his vision and it's got these titles >> or as the husband, >> my um [clears throat] purpose partner?
>> That's right. >> Right. >> That's right.
>> So likewise with me, >> you know, and so the best practice is vis vision casting.
>> This is where I think we should go and here's where I know we have the capacity to go. And that this this brings me to
the next as we go together. Do we have the capacity as a team? >> So you can use use that in family but
also in business as well. >> You know I know you can do it in operations. I know you can do it in HR.
I know you can do it as an accountant. I've seen your resume. I see your education. I know you can do it. But can
do we have the capacity as a team to >> to do it together? Yeah, >> because now we got different disc
personalities, a I a S, a C. >> Do we have the collective? And if we don't have the collective,
then we'll self-destruct. >> Mhm. >> It would be internal, not external.
>> And then the final is execution. >> So what's the vision? >> Do we have the collective um capacity?
>> And then let's get on with it. Execution. M >> and that's where you know strategy
comes, goals, KPIs >> are put in place >> and it should tie all the way back to
>> thatision vision. >> Yeah. And creating that corporate uh culture
>> and [clears throat] capacity. >> That's your mission statement. >> Why are we here?
>> Where are we going? >> Where do you see ourselves in some distant point in the future?
And then uh do we have the culture to build the capacity and that's in family that's in relationship and then we got
all the miracles happening and that's execution. >> That's good. I'd love to end with this
this execution question because it's it's actually what counts
ultimately. We're all going to get adjudicated on the numbers on the scoreboard,
>> right? Ultimately the when you know when the bell sounds uh I
think it was John Don who said not to know for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee, right?
>> When the bell sounds ultimately you and I are going to be adjudicated on the numbers on the scoreboard.
>> This is what I sent you to do. >> Have you done it? >> Mhm. Um, this execution part,
>> it seems to me, is the part where people lose it. Yesterday in in my keynote, I spoke to I was talking to these
entrepreneurs about implementation fatigue. >> Mhm.
>> And I said to them, the the what we've seen in our business is most entrepreneurs
fail when they fall out of love and into life with their business. >> Mhm.
>> And it's a lot like being in a long-term relationship, right? When you first meet a person, you're giddy and you get the
butterflies and everything they do is perfect. >> But sooner or later, life happens.
>> And and you get to experience them at a human level. >> Mhm.
>> And then you fall into life with them. And and if you are committed or married, now there's children and bills and that
happens, right? >> So when that happens, the only thing that
that that clears the fog >> is if there's a clear execution plan. Mhm.
>> Because if there's an execution plan, then neither you nor I has to guess what has to take place. I know, you know, we
know. >> Do your part, I'll do your part. As you said it, run your play, I'll run my
play. >> So there are leaders watching this conversation
and um they want to hear from Dr. Cindy's three principles
>> Mhm. >> of execution. What would you say those are? Um,
number one, self-care. >> Okay. >> You cannot care for a self that you
don't know. >> Yes, ma'am. >> So, it starts again with um
self-awareness and self-nowledge. That's very important. [snorts] >> Mhm.
>> You're not nurturing yourself from the perspective of a title or a role that you wear
>> cuz you're you're you're going to burn out quickly. >> Yes, ma'am. You want to be able to
center yourself >> in your own identity. Center it >> so good
>> without titles, without roles, without expectations. >> Center yourself
>> in yourself. >> So in centering yourself, using that word self-care, the biggest question is
how do you care >> for yourself? How do you decompress? How do you de-stress? How do you build
margin in your life? >> What makes you happy? What makes you feel satisfied? Do you go to bed every
night with a sense of satisfaction? And that's self- fulfillment. Got it. >> Have you operated at the highest level
of your potential? >> So, so that you're not living with regrets. [clears throat]
>> So, do the best you can >> and then go to sleep. [laughter] Never operate from a title or a role
that you play. >> Give yourself permission to grow. And in growing, life becomes your laboratory.
>> So good. >> Some things will blow up in your face, but that's still success because you
successfully discovered what will not bring the vision to pass or your dreams or your goal. You've successfully
discovered it. Like >> so good. um Edison >> Mhm.
>> a thousand times trying to create the light bulb. >> Mhm.
>> And so he he said, you know, I never failed. I just discovered a thousand ways of not creating God. So he he
changed the narrative, right? >> And spend more time being than doing. >> Mhm.
>> Be yourself. Mhm. >> Be the amazing um agent of change by demonstrating
change. >> And then when the bell toes >> Mhm.
>> and you stand before the great white throne. >> Amen.
>> And um he's handing out crowns. >> Amen. You're going to get a crown
if you and every day became the best version of yourself. >> Mhm.
>> Because selfmastery is not selfish. It means that you show up 100% as you
fulfilling your assignment in this earth like Superman, >> fulfilling
um your purpose. >> Mhm. and without intentionally
um walking out in the world >> um to do acts of humanitarianism >> you automatically do it
>> because that's >> without the effort
>> I love it >> because if I show up giving 100% >> of who I am
>> to life to the world to an assignment >> Yes ma'am >> then automatic ically I positively
impact the world and I positively move the world forward >> in my industry in my field by giving
everything that I'm I've got thus contributing to the world becoming a better place because I became a better
me >> so good >> so spend all the time becoming the next
best version of herself. And if that is raising seven children like my mother
>> in abject poverty >> and never remarrying >> and accepting the fact that she would
have more month than money, but her number one assignment was to raise Cindy Trim.
>> So powerful. >> She gets a crown. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> We don't know who Albert Einstein's mother was. M >> but when the school said he will never
learn and told his mother do not send him back to school. >> That's right.
>> Because he has a learning disability. >> Disability. That's what they said about him. That's right.
>> And when his mother said what did they say? And she says that you are too intelligent to go to this school.
>> So good. >> We have Albert Einstein. >> So good.
>> Who never secondguessed that. Although they thought he was on the spectrum,
he would become the best Albert Einstein >> in the world has ever seen. >> And he would define defy the scientific
community. >> Wow. >> Who said E does not equal MC² and you
can prove it. And it took a hundred years for them to build the technology >> to prove E= MC².
And many times, >> wow, >> we're not just making history.
Many times we're not just making history. Many times what we are doing is not for this generation.
>> It's for a generation unborn to time. >> Hey, >> and so even if you're resisted, you
still got to show up. >> Hey, praise Jesus. >> Even if they misunderstand you,
>> so good. >> You still got to show up. Even if they reject you,
>> you're still going to show up. >> You can still show up. Why? Rejection is just an announcement
that you've outgrown a realm or re realm, relationship, or region. And then a crisis will happen. A crisis is always
an announcement that the next best version of you is getting ready to evolve.
>> That's so good. >> So take hold of your life. Be responsible for the narrative, the
stories you tell about yourself. Because the stories we tell about ourselves is the stories that we
believe. So change your internal dialogue so that you can change the external outcome.
>> I wish I could open your skull and just like study your brain and get all of these wisdoms and download them into
like a USB and plug them into mine. >> Um >> and that's how we feel about you.
>> You know, me listening to to you, I said it makes so much sense. >> Thank you. And you know, there's the art
of something and there's the science of something. >> Yes, ma'am.
>> So, I like this because I speak of the science and you speak of the art. >> Yeah.
>> Is easy to digest art than it is to digest science. >> Science. Yeah. Yeah. I want to thank you
for this conversation. I uh were truly privileged. It's it's seldom
that um it's seldom that one can be in a conversation that can
expand your mind but do so in a structured way that you do it. Mh. >> And it's it's certainly very rare
>> to have somebody who has thought about the undergirling the sequencing of these thoughts and ideas that changed the
world >> and then taken the time to structure them scientifically the likes of which
you've done and then lived it. >> Mhm. >> It's the lived it part for me, right?
Cuz it's it's all great on paper until you're doing it. >> Yeah. And so I I want to say thank you
for just being you. >> Thank you so much. >> You shine a light I think um brighter
than than you yourself can can understand. Um you if you shine a light sometimes it
reaches its edges >> and often at the edges of where that light reaches are the people who most
need it. >> Yeah. Because those people don't make it into the center
>> from which the light is emitt. >> Mhm. >> But they need it nonetheless.
>> Yes. >> And uh Oh man, may your light shine ever brighter.
>> You know, I just want to end with this. Sometimes everything around you is dark.
>> Mhm. >> Because you're the light. >> You stop looking for the light.
>> Be the light. >> Just be it. >> [laughter]
>> Right. [laughter] >> The spotlight is not on you because you're the spotlight.
>> You are the spotlight. [laughter] >> Be the light. Be the light. >> Yeah. So, your perception is it's dark
in here. Yes. Cuz you're supposed to be the light. >> That's it.
>> That's so good. That's so good. The world is better for you in it. >> Thank you.
>> And uh thank you so much for for coming to South Africa. I know it's not your first time and we look forward to
hosting you here more. >> You know the one thing I love about South Africa.
>> Yes, ma'am. >> Don't laugh at me when I tell you. >> Right.
>> Ocean basket. [laughter] >> I'm in the States. I have visions and dreams. [laughter]
>> [cough] >> Besides besides [laughter] besides the people besides let me qualify that
besides the >> most amazing loving gifted intelligent people that are South Africans. The next
best thing about South Africa is >> Ocean Basket. I'll tell them. I'll tell them. So, um, we we're going to we're
going to we we'll add all of your um links to the different platforms that people can can find your work.
>> If there is somebody who's watching this conversation and they're encountering I don't know how, but they're encountering
Dr. Cindy Trim for the first time >> and they want to study your work, where would you recommend they start? What's
the first thing they should read? >> The first thing they should read is a book called Unstoppable,
>> right? >> The second is Prevail, >> right? And the third is Hello Tomorrow,
>> right? >> And then load and everything else, >> right?
>> Um and I I think they will be blessed. Um my first book ever that sold multi-millions
um was a book that I introduced the power of the spoken word >> and that was commending your morning. So
the trilogy is commending your morning, >> goodbye yesterday, hello tomorrow, >> hello tomorrow. And hello tomorrow will
help people with their vision. >> Right. >> Mhm.
>> Thank you, ma'am. >> Thank you so much. >> I've been honored and privileged.
>> Thank you. >> Ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Cindy Trim.
Self-mastery begins with self-awareness—the ability to know where you end and everyone else begins. Dr. Trimm explains that true mastery is about taking dominion over what you are not, rather than trying to control everything around you. This means not taking on others' perceptions or negative narratives, like a ship that sails in water but sinks when it takes it on.
Dr. Trimm suggests viewing rejection as a gift—an announcement that you have outgrown a relationship, realm, or region. She celebrates rejection because it gives the 'good gift of goodbye,' freeing you to move toward environments that can support your next level of greatness. This reframe turns a painful experience into an opportunity for alignment with your higher potential.
Dr. Trimm recommends creating a minimum 20-year life plan, written down and turned into spoken declarations. She emphasizes that vision acts like a broadcasting station, helping filter out noise and focus on what you want. Additionally, she advises spending 80% of your energy on internal 'being' and only 20% on external 'doing' to stay centered in your identity.
She warns never to repeat an untruth about yourself, as that programs your brain to become it. Instead, you can insist on a 'plot twist' in your life script and refuse to play a supporting role in a narrative you didn't write. By changing your internal dialogue, you reshape your reality and reclaim personal power.
Dr. Trimm uses the analogy of a ship that sails in water but sinks when it takes it on. This illustrates the importance of not internalizing others' drama, perceptions, or negativity. Practicing this boundary helps you maintain self-mastery and focus on your own growth without being overwhelmed by external influences.
Dr. Trimm advises that rather than competing to be the best, you should aim to be the only—showing up as the unique expression of yourself that no one else can replicate. This removes competition by focusing on your distinct strengths and vision, allowing you to stand out naturally without comparison to others.
She states that comfort is where dreams go to die, and you should avoid reaching a point of complete comfort, as it signals the end of growth. This urgency to evolve challenges you to continuously step outside familiar patterns, using discomfort as fuel for transformation and self-discovery.
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